Monday, November 4, 2013

Taking a Step Back.

As the end of this pregnancy has gotten closer and closer, I will admit that when people ask, "How are you feeling?" my immediate response is, "Good. Done, but good."  And it's just me being honest.  Being pregnant while being a full time mom to a toddler is no easy feat.  And, maybe because I already know what lies ahead, I've felt kind of "over" the whole pregnant thing.

Then I had a thought.

If we stick to our "plan" of having just two kids {who knows, we may change our minds in a few years}, then... this is it.

This is the last time that I will know the feeling of carrying another life inside me.

The last time that I will feel the kicks, stretches, and hiccups of a growing baby in my belly.

The last time I can embrace my baby bump, something that even though not always the most comfortable is still one of my favorite parts of pregnancy.

So, I need to stop.  I need to take a step back and soak this all up... just in case it never happens again.

Between the hormones, the lack of energy, and the craziness of life in general, it's easy to forget that the "end result" is not just the blessing, the whole process is.

There are women in the world that pay THOUSANDS of dollars for this experience... and some STILL don't get to have it.  So, I need to slow down.

I need to remember that I am lucky.  That this is something I will NEVER get back.  Ok, yeah, MAYBE we'll decide one day that we want to try for another baby, but I won't get this pregnancy back.  I won't be pregnant with Addison again.  And I need to cherish that.

I am going to stop saying that I am "Good. Done, but good." and just say that I am feeling "Good." or "Tired." or "Humongous." or whatever I may be feeling that specific day... but I'm not going to say "Done" anymore.  Because there will be a day that I am actually done being pregnant, and it may just be a sad day.

1 comment:

Peggy Aront said...

Thank you for saying what I was thinking..... :)
Being a mom has to be one of the hardest jobs EVER...and it's only natural to be anxious, wish for a lot of things to be over and done with but in the grand scheme of things you do want to sit back and enjoy the experience since as you said, it may never come again....
AND, we don't want some girls that haven't had babies yet to get scared LOL